Is the New MoonSwatch Collection Really ‘An Abomination’?

Well the Doc opened up the old mailbag today and here’s what poured out.

Dear Dr. Ads,

There I was, minding my own business and reading Jonathan V. Last’s Triad newsletter at The Bulwark, when I came across this item.

3. Watch Talk

It’s been a while since and I know that this if [sic] frivolous, but this just happened:

I have no words.

Taking the iconic Speedmaster Professional—the watch that went to the frickin’ moon—and turning it into a candy-colored hunk of plastic quartz . . . this is an abomination. An offense against God and nature. It’s like the Louvre partnering with Oscar Mayer to sell a Bologna Lisa.

So here’s my question, Doc: Do you want to see the Bologna Lisa as badly as I do?

– Swatched at Birth

Dear Swatched,

We’ll get to the art part shortly but first, commerce.

Here’s the full-page ad that ran in yesterday’s Wall Street Journal.

And here’s the press release from Swatch.

Swatch and Omega come together for an innovative take on the legendary Speedmaster Moonwatch.

Outer space inspires a new collection of eleven BIOCERAMIC watches named after planetary bodies that will have you reaching for the stars.

The Omega Speedmaster Moonwatch is legendary and a must-have for collectors. BIOCERAMIC Moon-Swatch collection makes the iconic design accessible to fans everywhere.

The Doc assumes that JVL would like nothing better than to stick the whole thing in a Falcon Heavy and fire it into the sun, but he’s distinctly in the minority according to this Gear Patrol piece by the site’s watch writer, Zen Love (apparently his real name).

This Omega x Swatch Collab Is Breaking the Internet

An unexpected collaboration has watch fans over the moon. Omega and Swatch have teamed up to offer a collection of 11 models of what they’re calling the MoonSwatch. Recreating the exact proportions and design of the famous Omega Speedmaster Moonwatch, these are quartz watches in Bioceramic cases…and they cost $260.

Yeah, tell that to JVL.

(Not to get technical about it, but Mr. Love never does explain exactly how the MoonSwatch is breaking  the Internet.)

As for the Bologna Lisa, the Doc did find a bunch of Lisa Bolognas, but none of them seem to have an enigmatic smile. Your punchline goes here.

Is Arnold Schwarzenegger’s Viral Message To the Russian People ‘His Finest Moment’?

Well the Doc opened up the old mailbag today and here’s what poured out.

Dear Dr. Ads,

There I was, minding my own business and  reading Jonathan V. Last’s Triad newsletter at The Bulwark, when I came across this item.

3. Extraordinary Leadership

I try to never waste your time and I will warn you up front that this is a 9-minute video. But it is an extraordinary display of leadership. This is Arnold Schwarzenegger speaking directly to the Russian people with a message that was designed in a lab to persuade . . .

his isn’t virtue signaling or sentiment. It’s meeting the Russian people where they are and talking honestly about his own history, the pain his father caused and then suffered from, the beauty and strength of the Russian people, and the truth that is being hidden from them.

Arnold Schwarzenegger has led a weird, wonderful, amazing life. And this is his finest moment.

What’s your diagnosis, Doc?

– Rushin’ to Judgement

Dear Rushin’,

First, you need to watch the video – all of it.

Here’s the text of the video (via The Atlantic).

Schwarzenegger’s plea is so honest, heartfelt, and direct, it’s hard not to be moved by it. You can Google the video all day long and not encounter a negative word about it. For those of you keeping score at home, Schwarzenegger’s Twitter feed got a robust reaction.

As for your question, Rushin’, if that video is not Arnold Schwarzenegger’s finest moment, it’ll do ’til something better comes along.