Well the Doc opened up the old mailbag today and here’s what poured out.

Dear Dr. Ads,

There I was, minding my own business and starting to paw through the New York Times, when I saw Rebecca Robbins’ front-page story about incoming Trump administration officials looking to euthanize pharmaceutical ads on TV.

Since the late 1990s, drug companies have spent tens of billions of dollars on television ads, drumming up demand for their products with cheerful jingles and scenes of dancing patients.

Now, some people up for top jobs in the incoming Trump administration are attacking such ads, setting up a clash with a powerful industry that has long had the courts on its side.

Robert F. Kennedy Jr., President-elect Donald J. Trump’s choice for health secretary, is a longtime critic of pharmaceutical advertising on TV, arguing that it leads broadcasters to more favorable coverage of the industry and does not improve Americans’ health. He has repeatedly and enthusiastically called for a ban on such ads.

What’s your professional opinion, Doc? Could Bobby Brainworm succeed where so many others have failed?

– On My Meds

Dear OMM,

Let’s start with a short history lesson, shall we?

Back in the ’90s, when the Food and Drug Administration first allowed pharmaceutical advertising to run on television, the ads could say the name of the drug but not what it did, or say what it did but not its name.

It was very Old Testament.

In 1997, though, the FDA bowed to the First Amendment and loosened it restrictions, “[allowing] drug manufacturers to describe the benefits of the drugs without providing long, detailed notices of the side effects. Instead, the F.D.A. said, the drug companies would be required to include in the advertisements a ‘brief summary’ of the major risks,” according to a Times piece that year.

Prescription drug commercials quickly developed a format to meet that requirement: The first half of the spot featured happy people living happy lives thanks to the wondrous effects of the drug; the second half featured a monotone voiceover intoning Contradictions & Side Effects (“Do not take Superion if you are allergic to it; side effects include headache, sudden death, something something something”) while images of windsurfers or giraffes or marching bands cranked up the Big  Pharma Distraction Machine.

(Nowadays, the Doc’s exposure to pharmaceutical commercials is largely limited to the ones that run on The Tennis Channel, most of whose viewers seem to be a) plagued by skin rashes, b) chronically short of breath, or c) allergic to whatever food their companion is enjoying.)

Those freewheeling days, however, appeared to be over when the FDA issued new rules for disclosure in the roughly $5 billion Big Pharma is slated to spend on national television advertising this year.

The Food and Drug Administration (FDA, the Agency, or we) is issuing a final rule to amend its regulations concerning direct-to-consumer (DTC) advertisements (ads) for human prescription drugs presented in television or radio format and stating the name of the drug and its conditions of use (DTC TV/radio ads). Specifically, the final rule implements a requirement of the Federal Food, Drug, and Cosmetic Act (FD&C Act), added by the Food and Drug Administration Amendments Act of 2007 (FDAAA), that in such DTC TV/radio ads, the major statement relating to side effects and contraindications must be presented in a clear, conspicuous, and neutral manner.

Drive PhRMA nuts graf: “In ads in TV format, the information presented in the audio portion of the major statement must also be presented concurrently in text for a sufficient duration to allow it to be read easily. In ads in TV format, the information in text must be formatted such that the information can be read easily. The ad must not include audio or visual elements during the presentation of the major statement that are likely to interfere with comprehension of the major statement.”

Loose translation: No more giraffes!

Except . . .

In our admittedly unscientific survey, there ‘s been only one minor change in prescription drugs ads since the FDA’s drop-dead date of November 20: the addition of small type at the bottom of the screen during disclosure. Other than that, the distraction machine grinds on.

The Doc’s diagnosis: If the federal government can’t even effectively regulate pharmaceutical advertising on television, it sure as hell doesn’t seem capable of banning it outright.

Someone send RFK Jr. some migraine medication, wouldya?